Posted by: eveyoga | March 10, 2011

Sequence for Grief

Sara "Cherry" Weinstein 1919-2011

My mother-in-law passed away today.

I feel very much saddened by her death.

I loved her.

Her dying seems tied to other griefs, and they have surfaced to get cleansed. I thank her for that.

I’m also grateful for the gift of her beloved son in my life, as well as his seven brothers and sisters.

Everyone deals with grief in their own way. When my mother died, I “moved on”. I didn’t know then that skipping over stones isn’t possible. Grief is a stalker. Better to face it, before it’s too late.

My sister-in-law Katie painted a picture of how Cherry looked this morning after the priest came to administer the ashes of Ash Wednesday, with the smudge cross on her forehead. The symbol of:

Remember that thou art dust, and to dust thou shalt return.

Then, the Last Rites.

This evening, I did some soulful yoga practice. Life and yoga go on.

Adho Mukha Svanasana, Uttanasana, Parsvottanasana, Prasarita Padottansana, Utthita Padangusthasana 1 & 2, Pincha Mayurasana, Sirsasana, Janu Sirsasana, Paschimottanasana, Triangamukhaikapada Paschimottanasana, Upavistha Konasana, Baddha Konasana, Bharadavajasana 1, Marichyasana 3, Sarvangasana, Halasana, Ardha Jatara Parivartanasana, Savasana

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Responses

  1. So sorry to hear of your loss Eve and Daniel’s of course – what a great beauty she was .. looking forward to seeing you tomorrow.
    All is well ..
    Much loving and kind thoughts to you both.
    Peter XX

  2. Very sorry to read of your loss.
    THe picture shows a lovely woman.
    It reminds me of early pictures of my aunt who passed away just a couple of weeks ago aged 87.
    Her death has had more of an impact on me that previous family deaths whether that be due to my own advancing years, or my ever changing persona.
    I was with her during her last weekend when she was very ill and up to about 4 hours before she diedpeacefully in hospital
    I hope to find a picture of her and my mother looking as glamourous as Cherry looks here.
    Best wishes
    Lin G

    • Hi Lin,
      In her life before children, Cherry lived in NYC and worked modelling the glamorous fashions of the forties.
      You’re right about being older having an impact on how we view death. I think it’s that we are getting glimpses of the future.
      Namaste, E

  3. I am so sorry to read of the great loss concerning your dear mother-in-law Eve, and for Daniel also. Another fine woman leaves this world, her photo, just beautiful! Yes, as you say grief is a stalker, clenching us in its grip. It’s challenge, giving into its healing and gifts, of which I am still learning … but as my marriage constantly reminds me, vulnerability opens the door to intimacy, connection, love …
    May your deepest self-care cradle you like a loving mother.
    With love,
    Arian

    • Your words are a healing balm, Arian. Thank you. E

  4. Hi Eve: I saw your posting about Cherry. Please know how much we two Aussie Yanks are greiving over here in the West. Someday we would love to catch up with you both.
    I received a letter from Rebecca asking me to contact the Bird cousins – which I just did. hope you don’t mind but I sent a copy of the photo you posted as well as some of your words to the Bird Cousins too.
    Best wishes – Jody & John

    • Hi Jody,
      Of course, I don’t mind you passing on Cherry’s photo and my words.
      I do hope we can get together one day. The distances are vast in Australia!
      Kind regards,
      E

  5. Thanks for sharing these very personal thoughts and feelings about Cherry, Eve. It’s interesting how we are given the chance to revisit unfinished business by being triggered in the present moment.

    I also “moved on” after my parents died, skipping over the grieving. Right now I’m feeling tearful, in a good way.

    My condolences to Daniel. I’m glad you were able to visit the family so recently.

    With love and gratitude,
    Lindy Reid

    • I understand “tearful in a good way”. That’s what I call cleansing. I’m so glad we visited Cherry last August. One fond memory is her beating us at scrabble!
      Fond regards,
      E


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